Public Spark

Valentines day can hold very different meanings for everyone. Wikipedia has an interesting entry on the history of Valentine’s Day.

For me, it has changed over the years. When I was a child, it was a fun holiday where I would hand out cards and candy to my friends. It was a day where I gave my parents a hand-made “I love you card.” As I got older, it was no longer the cute cards, but more the dating scene or couples scene. I was single for a long time, so I spent Valentines day wishing my friends and family happy v-day. I thought that it would be a more significant deal once I started dating.

After I met my boyfriend, we started celebrating Valentine’s but not in extravagant ways. For us, we think of it as a more “official” day/ excuse to buy things for each other or go to a nice dinner. It is only one of many days, as we do a lot more for each other on Non-Valentine’s days. We come to realize we enjoy the Non-Valentine’s days more because there is the surprise element. I know most people don’t interpret Valentine’s day to be the only day to express your love, but I think the media strongly gives that impression and the marketers want you to think that too.

Here are some ways to keep Valentines day alive every day of the year:

If you are single:

• Myscha Theriault from Wisebread blog has a great blog on Valentine ideas for the single crowd. This can apply to everyday life.

• I would also add that being single is a great time to be independent and socialize with many different crowds. It can be a wonderful time to travel with friends and family, as you may not have as much time once you are in a relationship and it is a different dynamic/ experience. Fostering healthy relationships during this time is also important.

If you are a couple:

• Loving actions throughout the year

  K. Stone writes of 50 ways to be romantic. These include making a CD with songs that are meaningful to your relationship, cooking a romantic meal, and creating a website dedicated to your partner. Similarly, Leo Babauta from Zen Habits suggests 50 ways to be romantic on the cheap. He offers great suggestions such as slow dancing to romantic music, sending a love email every day, pretending you are going on a first date, and saying I love you in a different way every day.

• Stable and happy relationships have hidden treasures along the way

  There can be stumbling blocks that emerge, but it is important to look at it as a way of improving your relationship. In an earlier post, I wrote about ways to handle differences with your significant others . Part of what makes a relationship challenging, but rewarding is being able to work out the differences and reach a new level of understanding. Perhaps the best Valentines treasures, are those that cannot be seen, but felt. Nothing can replace the feelings of security, mutual understanding, and lifelong support.

If you are single or a couple

• Natalie Lue from Askdanandjennifer blog wrote an article called 10 tips for Surviving Valentine’s Day When You’re single or attached.

I would love to hear your thoughts and comments.